Guest Blogger – July
My Pet Peeves in Life
Some stuff bugs me.
In fact, it bugs the hell out of me.
But the term “pet peeve” is actually kind of cute.
It brings to mind a small, furry creature, rubbing the side of its fuzzy little head persistently against my wrist when I’m trying to type on the computer.
“Pat me… rub me… pay attention to me… nowwwww.”
“Does Mama’s little pet peeve want some love and attention?” I ask, patting the furry creature’s back until it makes a satisfied mewling sound. “But, Gripes—you’ve got to stop bothering me so I can get some work done.”
noun: pet peeve; plural noun: pet peeves
something that a particular person finds especially annoying
In real life, pet peeves aren’t so cute. They’re annoying and frustrating and make you grit your teeth and ask, “Why? WHYYYYY????”
Let’s start with the word IRREGARDLESS.
“Merriam-Webster says ‘the most frequently repeated remark about irregardless is that there is no such word. There is such a word, however.’ It has been used (mistakenly) in place of regardless since the early 1900s and has now been admitted into dictionaries.”
The word irregardless was so incredibly persistent in its annoying behavior that it actually forced its way into the dictionary! (Which is like rewarding bad conduct, if you ask me.)
My advice: JUST SAY REGARDLESS.
(I’m already breathing too fast as I write about my very first pet peeve.)
And what’s with cars that cut in front of you when nobody is coming in either direction, just to make a quick turn? [This is a HUGE Pet Peeve of Jaime’s, just sayin‘]
You can bet your bottom that I have other pet peeves…
How about when people say, “She’s pretty, but fat” ? Um, hello! One is not mutually exclusive of the other. YOU CAN BE PRETTY AND FAT, YOU KNOW, PEOPLE!!! In fact, I like to think that I AM!!!
I’m sweating a little as I brainstorm—certain pet peeves truly make my blood boil.
The list goes on….
It drives me crazy when dogs come running toward me as I’m innocently walking by on the street, barking and growling like they want to tear me apart limb from limb, forcing me to curl up in a fetal ball on the sidewalk. But then the snarling beasts stop short at the very edge of their yard in order to avoid the electric shock they know they’ll get if put a single paw one inch closer to the street.
Don’t you think pedestrians are entitled to flashing neon yard signs that warn us? Maybe a huge hot pink sign that says, “HERE’s A HELPFUL HEADS UP for passers-by: My dog would like nothing better than to eat you for lunch, but–-no worries—you will remain safe as long as you stay the hell out of my yard. Electric collar in use.”
I’ve got another one. Are you really surprised?
People who proclaim to be avid followers of Jesus Christ but who want to refuse endangered and starving refugees admittance to our country and to rip away health care from people who need it most and to pass out guns to, like, EVERYBODY, and to tear apart families by tossing nonviolent, but undocumented, mothers of six out of our country… well, these “Christians” piss me off because, yeah, Jesus would be so cool with that stuff. (Yes, you do detect a hint of sarcasm.)
Line-cutters irritate the hell out of me, and they have since Bobby Sherman cut into the lunch line in front of me in first grade.
And let’s talk airlines. You get fined hundreds of dollars if you want to change a flight, or God forbid, you miss it because traffic was stopped on Route 93 South. But the airlines are allowed to say, “So sorry, Ms. Kerick, we canceled your flight. Good luck getting your family to its once-in-a-lifetime trip to Disney World that you’ve been saving for since the birth of your nine-year-old.” Or, “Yes, we think you’re flight is coming… we just don’t have a clue when.”
Apparently, my list of pet peeves is quite extensive.
Gum on the street… on a hot summer day. If you’re gonna litter, couldn’t you at least wrap your littered gum in a tiny piece of paper to save the soles of the rest of the population’s shoes?
It gives me the heebie-jeebies when a politician mispronounces nuclear.
“Repeat after me: NEW-CLEE-URRR. It’s kind of simple.”
Adults who get angry enough during kids’ sporting events to curse at the referee. (I know and love people who do this quite often. In fact, I could be one of these people.)
And my pet peeves with regard to Donald Trump… I don’t even know where to start. I guess I’ll start with “fake news”.
Autocorrect bugs me.
I typed a Facebook private message to a conservative male acquaintance. I asked: Do you want to show me?
And it morphed into: Do you want to shave me? Ugh.
You want a biggie?
FOX NEWS. FOX NEWS. FOX NEWS. (In the Mia Kerick dictionary, Bill O’Reilly and Sean Hannity’s pictures are conveniently placed beside the term FAKE NEWS.) I refuse to allow my housekeeper to watch FOX NEWS while cleaning my house, which is saying something because I believe in a human being’s personal freedom to choose, plus I’m a people-pleaser. And if Mr. Mia wants to get an alternative, conservative “opinion” on politics than the legal news stations in my house—CNN or MSNBC—said opinion must be acquired on the garage television.
I hate to generalize, but, in conclusion, I will:
Mean People Suck.
I have a lot more ground to cover in the pet peeve department, but Gripes is back, and he’s pestering me again. To be specific, he’s rubbing his wet nose rather irritatingly against my leg. I guess he wants to be fed.
And after that, I think it’s time I put my Gripes to bed for the night so I can relax enough to fall asleep.
For a Chance to Win a Special Swag pack from Mia Kerick post below about your pet peeves –
Don’t be shy, we want to hear them!!
This prize is limited to those in the U.S. due to shipping; however, all of you can comment!
Contest will Close July 11th, 2017
Contest Closed – No Entries
Mia focuses her stories on emotional growth in turbulent relationships. As she has a great affinity for the tortured hero, there is, at minimum, one in each book. As a teen, Mia filled spiral-bound notebooks with tales of said tortured heroes and stuffed them under her mattress for safekeeping. She is thankful to Dreamspinner Press, Harmony Ink Press, CoolDudes Publishing, Evernight Publishing, and Interlude Press for providing alternate places to stash her stories.
Her books have won two Kirkus Recommended Book Reviews, a Best YA Lesbian Rainbow Award, a Reader Views’ Book by Book Publicity Literary Award, the Jack Eadon Award for Best Book in Contemporary Drama, an Indie Fab Award, and a Royal Dragonfly Award for Cultural Diversity, among other awards.
Mia is a Progressive, a little bit too obsessed by politics, and cheers for each and every victory in the name of human rights. Her only major regret: never having taken typing or computer class in school, destining her to a life consumed with two-fingered pecking and constant prayer to the Gods of Technology.